restorationHere I was thinking about the past, my weaknesses, the times when I have hurt people and the times when people hurt me. To some degree it saddened me that I had been to such places and my heart has had to deal with all of these things. However another  part of me realised how far I have come. Situations where I could have given up and continued to make the wrong decisions and walk the shame. Times when I could have actually said that “swear” word and that being the moment of not caring anymore. However I did not and thank God.
In all cases I had to make a decision about my life and pick my self up and continue to move. In cases where I couldn’t run anymore, I walked or crawled, whatever the case was as stated by Martin Luther King, I kept on going. I had to dust it all off, face the world that wanted to eat me alive, the friends that were not so forgiving and move on. I had moments where life would hurt so bad I would not eat and when I drank something I would feel sick. Moments where my concentrating and focus would be swayed and my heart would beat as if I had been on a treadmill. The occasions where I had to seek forgiveness and in turn forgive someone.
I had to learn to let it all go, accept my faults and other peoples faults. Realise that I still had a life to live and God still had a plan for me. I had to understand that even if I had moved out of the path that God had set, I could still get back in there, cause God was and is a restoring Father.
So I would not have been the Vickie I am today, if I had not made those mistakes or experienced some of the hurt. Sometimes its not necessary that we do cause we can create those unpleasant situations by the decisions we make. However when it happens, choose not to stay down but fight for your restoration.
So I am not Miss Perfect, far from it, I will make mistakes as I go but I will learn from them.
“Brethren, I do not regard myself as having laid hold of it yet; but one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and reaching forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus” -Philippians 3:14